Hurdles – Part II

Clearing Your Hurdles

So you’ve identified your hurdles and now it feels overwhelming or depressing?

Or you haven’t gotten past first base, because you got stuck?

No worries. Hang in there!

Everyone has hurdles in life. Many every day,  in fact.

Let’s look back at the hurdles we talked about a few days ago. (If you missed that, you can catch up here.) When you face hurdles, there are always ways to turn them around. That may sound far too glib and easy – it certainly is a journey.

Let’s start with…

Self doubt:
One of the most remarkable responses to self doubt that I’ve seen in a long time is right here! Some may doubt this kind of approach, but there is something powerful about the words we speak.

Doesn’t this motivate you to persevere? And to find someone who will have that kind of impact on you? You’ll find your journey transformed when you have people around you who will constantly remind you of your worth, your ability, your potential. (If you didn’t watch the clip, please do so! And then meet me back here!)

The way to clear the hurdle of self doubt is by gaining new perspectives of who you are and what you can achieve.
………I’d love to speak with you about the power of your words.
………What can you achieve?
………How will you make progress?

Every step is significant. Notice it! Celebrate it!

Inability to let go or forgive:
The need to forgive and let hurts go seems to be a universal challenge. Many profound things have been said and written about it; there’s no need to add to it.

What we need is a practical, workable, self-respecting way to approach forgiveness.

Letting go or the act of forgiving is not about glossing over what someone has done to you, it is not giving the person who hurt you a free pass, it’s not a one-time-gets-it-done event. Letting go will take time – but it is doable and it is worth it!

I’ve found Byron Katie’s approach to life, hurt, and spiritual growth to be extremely insightful. She speaks and writes about loving what is. I admit  it took me some time before I was ready to hear what she had to say. I encourage you to consider her message. You can see her book here, and check out her website here.

When we love what is, we stop kicking, striving, expending energy to remove the hurt or the one who has inflicted the wound on us. It’s a remarkably simple, yet profound approach. If you’d like to speak about it , please let me know.

Ahhh yes. The time stealers. What is it for you? I mentioned social media in Part I, but yours may be video games, shopping, catching up on the news, watching movies, talking on the phone – anything that takes time you actually would like to invest elsewhere.

It’s important to acknowledge that none of these activities are the problem. (The exceptions are activities / practices which are addictions, or the point when any activity becomes an addiction.) Balance and limits are key.

If you want to connect on social media, for example, decide beforehand how much time you have / are willing to spend. Then, set a timer, and physically change location or position when it rings. You may laugh and say, how insane! A timer for how long to be on social media? (Or whatever your activity of choice is!) Yup! You got it!

Remember, you have goals! Big and important goals – things only you can do. What’s blocking you from reaching these goals?

If you find it a struggle to identify your goals and to adjust your life so you can reach them, please reach out so we can talk. A mentor, a cheerleader, an accountability partner is invaluable to getting and staying on track.

Having lost control:
How do you clear a hurdle when you have lost control, or there is simply no let up of things coming at you?

Once you have come to a place where you need something to change, sit back and breathe. That’s more difficult than you may think. But you need perspective. So unplug and unwind. For some that means beach time. Or hiking in the mountains. Or an hour in the backyard. Or a night spent with friends.

One word of caution: it’s easy to fill up the “sit back” time, so that it doesn’t have the desired effect. What’s needed is finding a way to again see the bigger picture, coming back into that “wide open space”. This  may help you visualize.

Once you sense some return of equilibrium, you can take it one step at a time. To pin-point what you’re finding challenging, here are some questions you could ask yourself:

* What’s causing me the most frustration right now?
* Do I have the expertise to move this situation / the project along one more step, or do I need someone to help me?
* What is the next step I could take?

And if there seems to be a serious, sustained roadblock, ask yourself:

* Can someone help me see what I’m unable to see?
* Do I need to change course?

These are questions you may need to mull over for a time, and find someone to speak with about.

With every hurdle (yours included), there are ways to understand and clear them. Like with athletes, it will require effort, coaching, encouragement and perseverance.

But YOU can do this!
I believe in you!
What are you going to do about it?
I’d love to hear from you!

Talk soon,

Photo Credit:
Photo Credit: © Stacey L. Rhoades. Used with permission


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